Death in America #funerary customs

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Traditional funerals have fallen out of favor in recent years, with many unmarried individuals opting for "natural burials", a practice in which their body is rolled into a little-loved carpet, set in the corner, and after several months to a year, displayed proudly in the front hall of the home.  This type of final disposition can be somewhat disturbing, limiting it to the cold, the friendless, and alone.  It can therefore be somewhat of a shock to passers-by when a "surprise viewing" is conducted.  Many funeral homes urge those opting for natural burial to hold a friendly sign with the home's telephone number, and several of the most popular have printed "Natural Packets" for home use, including an example sign.  This method is not advised for those with dogs or cats, as the pet has been known to spoil the effect by gnawing upon the remains.

Other deceased are sent to the cording factory, where their teeth and sinews are woven into wall-hangings and jewelry.  In American jewelry stores, where elephant ivory has been outlawed since 1879, teeth and carved bone make up a great deal of exported ivory jewelry.  The sinews of the corded are in high demand for securing the handle of many a chef's favorite knife.  

"Cremains" add a rich flavor to home meat smokers and barbecues across the country, with the vintage clearly marked by date of death, method, and occasionally even photographs.

After the death of Dr. Jack Kevorkian in 2011, cremation numbers dropped rapidly, and home deaths became a much more common phenomenon, with "Comfort and Ease" being quoted as the number one reason for the ending of a life.  Second only to comfort and ease was the return of the Icthyus Comet in 2015, with the ending of the Mayan calendar in 2012 running a close third.  

As the population dwindles, American funerary customs continue to evolve, with a growing lack of professionals to attend to previously fast-held beliefs on the nature of death.